November 15, 2011

  • Vaccines- reposted by popular demand

    I wrote this post about 2 years ago and have had dozens of questions about it, especially lately.  So here is the whole post, with a few updates :)

    Our view on Vaccines

          

    When Caleb was born, I delayed giving him any shots for 6 months so that I could thoroughly research the topic of vaccines. So, here by popular demand is my research findings on Vaccines. This is the proposed schedule I am using for Caleb. I am not a doctor and don't pretend to be any sort of medical expert. What I found in my research is that there is indeed a risk associated with taking vaccines. (If your doctor insists there is NO risk, politely thank him and look for a new doctor) However, the risk is usually for smaller complications than those that would arise from actually contracting the disease for which the vaccine was created. Some minor complications include food allergies (wheat, dairy, nuts, etc) skin disorders (eczema) and attention deficit disorders. Major complications are much more rare and include mercury/aluminum poisining (which masquerades as Autism), severe allergic reactions, and (in very rare cases) death. The fact that some children suffer these symptoms should not keep you from vaccinating your child. Only 50 years ago, hundreds of children were dying of Diptheria and other horrible diseases which are now almost absolete in the civilized world. Whether minor or major complications occur, the fact still is that more children are living healthier lives and reaching adulthood than they did before vaccines. I do not recommend going entirely without vaccine. That idea only works in a world where you have herd immunity, where the majority of the population still vaccinates. With the public becoming more and more educated on the dangers of vaccinations, this 'herd immunity' will start to waiver and open our children up to even greater risks. This risk is heightened by the number of illegal immigrants who are introducing diseases that had been formerly eradicated in our country.

    While I do recommend getting vaccines, I suggest giving them on a modified schedule to minimize or prevent any possible side effects. Studies have found that most complications occur when any of the following three factors are involved:
    1. A child receives multiple shots in one day (some children receive up to nine in one visit!)
    2.The child is already ill at the time they receive the vaccine
    3.There are preservatives present in the vaccine (Thimerasol, aluminum, etc)

    The most common complaint comes from parents whose children have received multiple shots in one setting. A baby's immune system is very weak during the first year. The very nature of a vaccine is to depress the entire immune system while building immunity to the one disease it is trying to prevent. While a baby may be able to handle the depressed immune system from a single vaccine, it becomes increasingly difficult for their immune system to rebound after multiple doses. During the days following vaccinations, the infant is very sensitive to any exposure to foreign elements. For example, a nursing mother may have milk or peanut butter and their child subsuquently devlops allergies to nuts and dairy. Food allergies often appear as early as two months or four months, right after the child has received their monthly shots. They continue to appear after six months as well, but it is the early allergies that are very alarming, as a child has not been formerly introduced to those foods except through a mother's breast milk or in formula. (Some children may be born with allergies, but the ones we are concerned with are those that develop allergies AFTER brith and more ironically, AFTER shots) Food allergies have increased ten fold over the past fifteen years and this is one explanation. Another allergic reaction is the development of Eczema -which is extremely common in young children. SIDS deaths are most common in two to four month olds. Infants are twelve times as likely to die in the two to three days following their vaccinations. I do not believe that SIDS is caused entirely by vaccines but I do think that, when other factors are present, vaccinations greatly increase the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome. Many people claim that it is simply a defect that the child is born with. But if that is the case, then why doesn't it affect them until two to four months? Why didn't it happen in the first few weeks of life? Clearly, SIDS cannot be solely contributed to a problem present at birth. The problem of receiving too many vaccines at once is easy enough to solve. Simply insist that your child receive no more than one vaccine at a time. Explain that you are willing to return to receive the other vaccines at a later time (it is usually best to wait a month between vaccines) Beware that many vaccines carry multiple doses in a single shot. If possible, try to have them separated -as in the case of the MMR, which I will explain later.

    A second cause for complications arising from the vaccinations is when the child is ill at the time they receive the shot. This introduces a new disease while the child is already fighting an illness. The combination of the two is enough to overwhelm the child's immune system and cause serious reactions. This is very easy to prevent. Always wait until the child is perfectly healthy and there are no other family members who are sick. Many doctors recommend giving Vitamin C the day before, the day of and the day after receiving a vaccination. This helps to boost the infants immune system in preparation for the vaccine.

    The third complication is caused by the preservatives used in vaccinations. Most doctors use a huge vat of vaccine. Every time they give a shot, they must reach into the vat and pull out a small amount. Each time they do this, they risk contaminating the entire batch. This is why a preservative is necessary. The preservative of choice have been aluminum or mercury, more commonly known as Thimerasol. Thimerasol was recently recognized as a serious health hazard and removed from all of the vaccines as of 2000. If you receive a vaccine that is older than this, it will almost certainly contain Thimerasol. I have no idea what preservative theyare using in place of this...I sincerely hope it is safer than Thimerasol (but I wouldn't count on it!). The best way to avoid this is to use a doctor who has separate vials. My doctor orders the individual vials, rather than a vat of vaccine. When done this way, there is no need for a preservative and this eliminates much of the risk. The complications that arise from Thimerasol (or other preservatives, including aluminium) are common to the symptoms of Autism. Autism is a genetic disorder. Ironically, this 'genetic' disorder has increased from every 1 in 100,000 children to 1 in 150 children today. This is very alarming! However, after researching the symptoms of Autism, the age at which it appears, and the possible links to vaccinations, many doctors are now realizing that many of these children are not suffering from Autimsm, but Mercury poisoning. Doctors will say that Autism cannot be caused by vaccines. They are absolutley right. But Mercury poisoning has many of the same symptoms (with a few distinct differences) and is often misdiagnosed as Autism. If you notice your child behaving strangely in the days following a vaccine, it is imperative that you act quickly. You can give your child vitamin A to help their body release excess mercury. Studies show that the children that develop Autism like symptoms are those whose bodies do not eliminate toxic waste as well as others. The Vitamin A (which I recommend giving the day before, the day of and the day after a vaccine) helps the body to release the mercury. If the symptoms continue, you must see a doctor immediately to get help. Caught early, these symptoms can be ENTIRELY reversed. If it continues too long however, the child will be permanently stunted. An infant needs to grow and learn many things in their first 18 months and if they suffer from mercury poisoning and are unable to stimulate their brain, the synapses in their brain will die off and they will suffer permanent damage. As adults, our livers produce bile, which is an agent that elminates toxic chemicals from the body. Infants' livers do not create bile until after the first year. This means that their bodies have a much more difficult time ridding themselves of the hazardous mercury injected into their bloodstream. In addition, the blood-brain barrier is not fully developed until after the first year. This barrier is meant to prevent foreign matter from entering the brain. Imagine the complications that can occur when this is not fully developed!

    I know this is a lot of information, but I will try to summarize it for you. Most problems can be prevented by waiting until the child is a bit older to give vaccines. I waited until 9 months before giving Caleb his first shot. Wait until they are healthy and always give Vitamin C and Vitamin A in the days preceding and following the shot. Never give more than one shot at a time. If possible, wait until fifteen months to give the MMR and then give it in three separate doses. You will have to special order this and I can give you the information if necessary on how to order it. The MMR is considered the most dangerous of all the shots and most (if not all ) problems can be prevented by giving three separate doses, rather than all at once. Try to find a doctor that orders separate vials of the vaccine, rather than using a general vat of vaccine. Check to be sure that your doctor does not have Thimerasol in their vaccines. Before your child receives any shot, ask for the lot number and batch number. Usually, this will include the year the vaccine was made and the year it expires. If it was made before 2000, it likely has Thimerasol. Ask your doctor to be sure.

    Below is the modified vaccine schedule I am providing for Caleb. I would like to reiterate that I am NOT a doctor and have no right to be making recommenations of a medical sort. I am simply telling you what I have found in my research and what I have decided to do for my own child. If you have any questions or would like to do your own research, I recommend reading "What your Doctor may not tell you about Immunizations" By Stephanie Cave. Dr Sears has also recently published a book and I have heard good things about it...I believe it is called "The Vaccine book" or something. Here is my Vaccine schedule:

    • Hepatitis B-never give unless the mother has Hepatitis B! One of the more dangerous shots and totally unnecessary if you don't have it. This one is given at birth, in the hospital- they gave it to Caleb without even asking me, so if you want to avoid this one, you have to put it in your birth plan and make sure you are on your toes in the minutes following birth. It is totally unnecessary...Hepatitis B is only found in people who shoot up (do drugs), are sexually promiscuous, or whose mother has it. If you don't have Hep B, don't give your child the shot.
    • HIB-Give at 6 months (two shots about 6 months apart)
    • IPV-skip this one -only give it if you plan to take them out of the country- Polio no longer exists in America
    • DTaP -Give at 9 months -give followup doses about 2-6 months apart (you may consider giving the DT instead, if your doctor doesn't offer separate vials of vaccines; the DTaP when paired with the preservative seems to cause allergic reactions)
    • Pneumonococcal-Don't give this one; the safety and efficacy has not been proved
    • Varicella (chicken pox)-wait until 6 years and check their titers (they may be immuned!) We opted to take a 'wait and see'  approach.  All three of our kids got them, so we didn't have to worry with it.  The chicken pox vaccine is not very effective...many people get it in spite of the vaccine.  You also have to give boosters every few years for the rest of your life.  So be prepared to remind your 45 year old son to get his chicken pox vaccine or he may get chicken pox from his own children when they get their vaccines :)   Our children contracted the chicken pox from children in our church nursery that had recently been vaccinated.  (yes, that happens!  With all types of vaccines...eg. the best way to get whooping cough is to be exposed to someone who has just had the vaccine)
    • MMR -you can no longer order these separately.  Your doctor will want to give this at 12-15 months.  We waited until over 2 years old to give it and had no problems whatsoever. 

    I hope this helps answer some of your questions on vaccines!  Do you own research.  Pray about it.  The important thing is to listen to God's prompting on this issue.  If you feel strongly that you should give vaccines, then perhaps God is prompting you to do so to protect your children from something they will be exposed to.  If you feel strongly opposed to giving any vaccines (after prayer, not personal opinion) then perhaps your child is one that would have harmful side effects. Seek God and trust him for guidance in this area.  If you are going overseas, as missionaries, for work, etc, you will need to consider carefully the additional vaccines required. 

November 8, 2011

  • Funny things kids say :)

    Yes, a post is long overdue!  A busy mother of three (and homeschooling!) has kept my heart and hands full with no time to journal our life here.  But here are a few children-ese sayings that i don't want to forget!

    "Stop talking with your mouth full!" says Caleb, with his mouth full.

    "It's a mosquito!" said Jackson, as he heard an airplane buzzing in the sky

    "It's dark" says Jackson, with his eyes squeezed shut :)

    Jackson stood, staring thoughtfully at a bag of rubberbands: "Is that spaghetti?" he asked.

     

    Caleb: "Mommy look!  Mommy look!  It's a hippopatamus!!"

    Me,surprised that we should be so lucky as to spot a Hippo on our drive through the city: "What??!Where?...oh; do you mean that armadillo?" You might be in Texas if... :)

     

    Me:"Boys, let's go get our oil changed"

    Caleb: "Ugghhh! I don't want my oil changed!!...is it going to hurt?!"

     

    Jackson had a diaper rash; so I put diaper creme on it.  He looked at me, nose curled up and said "Eeww, why you put sour cream on me?!"

     

    Caleb was watching intently as I carefully removed the skin from a whole chicken. Finally he asked "Soooo...are you taking his shirt off?" :)

     

September 18, 2011

  • Our journey with a strong willed child

    I have had several friends ask me recently if I had any advice to share on raising strong willed children.  I don't have much advice, really.  But maybe I can share the story of my journey and perhaps it will help some of you parents out there with strong willed children of your own!  Here is what I shared with a friend today:

    With Caleb, we knew we were in trouble before he was born...he was very strong and very active. At just 23 weeks pregnant, he kicked so hard that he tore the muscle along one side of my belly...this shocked even the midwives! But you don't know that you're child is disobeying until they can move around at will. He started crawling at 4months...the 'honeymoon' was over! He would crawl up to an outlet and play with it. I would pull him away and say 'no'. He set his face, pushed out the lip and crawled right back. This amazed me! We are born with a sin nature! We began disciplining right then, at just four months. We didn't want to use the rod, but we found discipline ineffective without it. We purchased a very small, slender rod from the craft section of Wal-Mart and began giving him gentle swats on his upper thigh. This was not hard enough to make him cry, but just enough to sting and make him pause. I had read a book called "To Train up a Child" before he was born. It advocates training a child rather than simply disciplining. Training a child is teaching them to do what is right. Discipline is giving negative consequences when they disobey. If you lovingly train, the book reasons, you will spend less and less time in the future on spankings and discipline. We got to try it out when he crawled all the way up the stairs at just four months. This was a matter that HAD to be dealt with! We started swatting each time he tried to climb the stairs. We left a rod in the crack of the stairs and, within just a few days, he had learned to not go up them at all. We never had to have a baby gate! In this way, we were able to work on training him to do the right thing before he was old enough to reason with. 

    There were months it felt like our whole days and weeks were filled with training and disciplining! But by the time he reached two, we had already dealt with the 'terrible twos' and he was greatly improved. One note about 'To Train up a Child': though I love it and agree with much of it, I find that with strong willed chilren, you cannot be too severe. This will only make them rebell more. I tried to put too many rules on Caleb all at once...he reacted with anger and fierce tantrums (ie holding his breath till he went limp, banging his head on the tile till he bled, etc) In "The Strong Willed Child" (James Dobson) He says to "pick your battles carefully, win decisively". I learned to evaluate whether this was something that was really 'wrong' or if it was just inconvenient for me.  I asked myself if he could injure himself or others or if it was disrespectful of others. I tried to say 'yes' more often and to say 'no' only when necessary (and then be willing to stick to my guns on the issue) A lot of discipline with boys centers around them being too active, too rough, too loud and too messy. These are just part of a boy's nature! I learned to give him grace, to let him be rambunxious when it was appropriate. This helped to relieve the more severe tantrums, which came as a result of his frustration over me being too strict. And it also let him know that when I said 'no', I meant it and would not back down (another EXCELLENT book on this topic is "Grace Based Parenting", by Ted Kimmel) More than anything, it is important to realize that how your children relate to you, is how they will learn to relate to God. We are to point them to God through our discipline and training. If you can only read one book, read "Don't make me count to Three" (Ginger Plowman). She talks about getting to the heart of the issue....instead of saying "Don't hit your sister" think about why it is wrong...you will then say "Are you being kind to one another?" This deals with the heart, not just the outward behavior. We use scripture verses to back up our training these days. "Be kind to one another" "Let no unwholesome talk come out of your mouth" etc.

    Although Caleb improved dramatically with careful training, discipline, and a lot of grace, we couldn't expect him to have a change of heart unless he had Christ in his heart. When we disciplined he would scream in anger, he NEVER cried! I spent many nights on my knees, praying...tears streaming down my face, begging God to soften his hard heart, to call him by name. Slowly, we began to see a change. He started screaming less. And then, he started to be more upset about the fact that we were displeased with his behaviour than about the spanking he knew was coming. He began to hug us back when we hugged him after a spanking. One miraculous day, out of the blue, he asked where God lived. We told him he lived in heaven. He asked if he could go and see God.:) As if it were a trip to Granny's house! We explained that you had to be without sin to go to heaven...but that we all have sinned. We told him that we could never be sinless....we said that Mommy and Daddy had asked Jesus to pay for our sins and to make us clean, so we could go to heaven and be with him. And then, he prayed for Jesus to come and clean his heart and pay for his sins too, so he could go to heaven with Mommy and Daddy and see God! Wow! He had just had his third birthday and I was skeptical that he could really understand what he was doing. But we decided to look for fruit, and for a change of heart to see if this was genuine. At first, his behaviour got worse...I think he may have been under a spiritual attack. We began praying harder. This battle for the heart is best fought on our knees. In just a few months, we saw dramatic changes. A boy who had been so terribly hardhearted, became softer. He had never let us hug him much, not even when he was only a few months old. But suddenly, his heart was sweet and soft, and he was even initiating hugs. He started sharing toys and having compassion towards others. A shocking change from the stubborn strong willed child we had come to know. It is sixteen months since he prayed to accept Christ and we now believe that his decision was real. We see the fruit of his decision. In the end, this is the only 'cure' for the strong willed child. It doesn't mean we don't still struggle, but we have seen great improvement and we see in him a heart that longs to do what is right. And that, my sweet friend, is a miracle!

September 16, 2011

September 13, 2011

September 7, 2011

  • Miriam Claire

    Miriam will be 5 months old on the 17th.  She can roll over, 'sing', talk and smile and giggle.  She is an absolute sweetheart!  She often sleeps through the night, though there are many nights she does not.  (by sleeping through the night, I mean she goes 8-9 hours!  A real treat for us, since Caleb often wakes up more times in the night than she does)  Her eyes get more blue every day! 

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    My sister Jenny took these pictures www.norrispictures.com Isn't it awesome having a photographer in the family? 

September 1, 2011

  • My kitchen table is littered with several types of bullets and a dizzying assortment of guns.  Are we beginning a revolution?  No; we are bringing up boys.

August 24, 2011

  • Crime and Punishment

    Caleb got in his first fight today.  At least it was his first school fight. Only the second day and already in a schoolyard brawl!  Fists were thrown, punches were exchanged...it was a real humdinger of a show! From what I hear, anyways. He's never been one to pick a fight, but he has a 'bring it on' attitude if someone tries to fight with him.  Caleb emerged without a scratch.  I hear the other boy has an injured thumb.  Apparently he tried to take Caleb's ice-pack away...obviously that merits a 'broken' thumb! Crime and Punishment.

     

    In other news, he donned this outfit (one of his favorite pajama sets...I did NOT purchase this!) He declared proudly "When I'm in heaven, I wanna wear this!"

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    Our favorite days are Tuesdays and Fridays, because we get to watch the garbage trucks pick up our trash!

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    Our sleeping princess, in her very first tutu

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    What a great big brother he is going to be!

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August 23, 2011

August 22, 2011

  • Caleb's First day of School!!

    Despite his adamant protests and vows that he would not go, Caleb did, in fact, go to school today.  He has been protesting it for months saying that he 'won't go' and that he 'can't learn'.  But after orientation on Thursday night, he changed his mind.  God blessed us with three friends in the class; all of them girls who are delighted about going to school.  Overnight, he was a changed boy!  "Can I go to school today?  When can I start?!"  Today's the day! 

    I was a little sad...mostly schocked.  How did we get here already? How can it already be time for him to go off to school? It seems like he can't be that old!  I made the lunch and snacks the night before and laid out all the clothes.  I made breakfast and put it in the oven, ready to turn it on in the morning.  Thanks to my excellent planning :) we had no trouble getting out the door by 7:30 this morning.  Great timing...the school is only nine miles away andwe don't have to be there until 8:15...45 minutes!  I did not, however, account for the fact that everybody forgets how to drive on the first day of school.  It took me twenty minutes to get to the freeway!  (normally a two minute drive)It was about this time that I realized I had left my purse at home and was driving without a driver's license or a phone (!) After wrestling with traffic for 41minutes, we pulled into the parking lot with four minutes to spare.  No problem, I can do this! 

    I opened the car door and realized, to my horror, that Caleb had undressed himself in the backseat.  In a huff I started pulling on socks and shoes, tucking his shirt, etc. etc. This used up three minutes.  Then I clicked the button to close the minivan door.  It slid slowly shut and, at the very last minute, Jackson thrust his fingers in the closing crack on the back of the door :(   He screamed in agony, attracting the attention of the entire parking lot (and of everyone within a mile radius, I'm sure!) The door was locked and I had to fumble for my keys in the sling before I could unlock it and free his fingers.  My poor dear boy!

    Despite our drama, I was determined to get a 'first day of school' photo.  By golly, if we were gonna be screaming and crying, I was going to document those tear stained cheeks and grumpy faces for posterity. I pulled out my camera, clicked it on.  A little light flashed and said "charge battery pack".  WHAT!!! The blasted thing only has to be charged once a month and it picks today to go out on me?!! 

    We dragged ourselves into the school in time to catch part of morning assembly.  Caleb walked bravely up to the front with a teacher (no crying!) And seemed to enjoy himself immensely.  What a relief!  Well, he's off on a great adventure :)   I can't wait to pick him up and hear how he did!  Jackson already misses him terribly and had a hard time going down for naps without his big brother.  Here are some pictures that I took before the camera unexpectedly died on me!

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    His nap mat, which he LOVES! I loved the Navy and Polka dot green so much, that I decided to label everything with it :)

     

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    I got a bit carried away with it! 

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    His lunch that I packed for him....complete with a Baby Bell cheese made to look like a pirate :) It took me a long time to make this lunch last night; I'm going to have to speed it up a bit!

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    Do you like this view of his school uniform?  He looks adorable in it, but I couldn't get him to pose before we left, so this will have to do.

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    Here is a better shot of Caleb, yesterday.  He was very disappointed that he couldn't wear his boots and pirate eye patch to school.  (by the way, I didn't tell him to pose like this...because he wouldn't have done it if I asked him!  He just happened to be sitting like this)

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    And here is a typical Caleb expression.  His poor teacher...I wish her luck!